Pissing when drunk

[Dutch Raven]

So, what's the worst place you've ever pissed?

For me it's the dustbin in my bedroom. You should have seen the look on my mom's face when she came in to check if I was allright.
Damn, I was drunk.

A friend of mine once just pissed down the stairs from the attic down.

[Dawgnuts]

I don't know about the worst, but the best was your moms butt.

[Dutch Raven]

Shit, you must have been really drunk to piss on that skank!

[fuckthebullshit]

Just the sink... Nowehere THAT weird, I suppose.

I had a friend who pissed in the dresser drawers at our last Christmas party. :(

[WH Jay]

Off a bridge over the motorway.

On the steps of a police station.

Asleep in my mates car.

[london callum]

Wasn't that weird but I was stood their talking to this girl. Just turned round and started pissing in the pond behind us while still talking to her. She is now a good mate of mine.

[london callum]

Off a bridge over the motorway.



I done that one as well.

[Mamaskin]

Behind a big smelly dumpster in Boston. I was drunk and about to piss myself do i went behind it and when i came out a rat the size of a cat ran out. I must of flooded him out.

[EastBankHooligan]

Out the little hole in the window of a tourbus bathroom while zipping down the interstate. It started a little secret society in High school known as POW's for those who had Pissed Out the Window.

[dkmhobbit]

You've all got me beat. Best I ever did was through the broken-out screen part of a door at a buddy's apartment. Greatest thing about it was that it was well below freezing, and I'm pretty sure somebody slipped and fell on frozen pee the next morning.

[pxscooterskin]

A mate's mum's Yucca plant pot... it was some time ago.

[Mike]

True story: I had a buddy that would "sleep piss" all the time. He would wake up in the middle of the night and piss in his wifes shoes and sometimes in her dresser drawers. I don't know what the fuck was going on with that.

[LostinKS]

hell..i've taken the appropriate late night whiz off the 3rd floor of a parking garage balcony down in old town here, right onto the heater/ ac condenser outside of a hotel couple august's back...pissed off that damn balcony more than once, about hit a couple people one time!!! another time was down the same road, 24th bday did 24 for 24 in a little under an hour and a half, wound up gettin half naked and pissing in the corner of a doorway to a business...hmm...balcony,balcony, stairwell...puked behind one of the clubs once, after gettin kicked out...forgot my girl down there lol she had to get a ride home cuz i wond up passing out on the same 3r floor of that previous pking garage, only after walking up two flights and yacking every 30-45 feet...best part-puked on some preppy bitches lil suv as she was walkin away...

[ManoRevolver]

Are golden showers considered weird in this thread?

[Dutch Raven]

Are golden showers considered weird in this thread?

Only if you have recieved or given them to guys for sexual pleasure.

[pxscooterskin]

Are golden showers considered weird in this thread?

In any thread.

[grouchybastid]

I was sitting in a subway and the fucking thing wouldn't get moving. So I pissed out the open door of the subway car onto the platform. That's basically all I remember of the next 3 hours getting home.

[Weasel]

just the other night at the bar i unzipped at a table, pissed into a pint glass and set it up on the table.

[ManoRevolver]

In any thread.

Oh man :rolleyes: , I'll just give it a rest then. :D

[Dutch Raven]

Let me geuss? Gerrit?

I was sitting in a subway and the fucking thing wouldn't get moving. So I pissed out the open door of the subway car onto the platform. That's basically all I remember of the next 3 hours getting home.

Hahahaa, reminds me of the time we pissed all over the instruments of the train machinist! The whole panel was soaked!

And we very often piss in trains and buses. Buses a little less and only if the driver is a dick. The people from the trains are always dicks.

Oh yeah, I also pissed in some letterboxes.

[ManoRevolver]

Haha, Gerrit.
I wanted to reply that to your comment, but uuh, yeah, it wasnt Gerrit actually, but his mom.

[Dutch Raven]

Ok, now you have to be kidding?

[ManoRevolver]

Why would I make a joke about someone's mamma.
Respect the family!

[Dutch Raven]

No, that can't be...

[ManoRevolver]

;)....

[Diana E]

Behind a big smelly dumpster in Boston. I was drunk and about to piss myself do i went behind it and when i came out a rat the size of a cat ran out. I must of flooded him out.

Yeah, pretty much the same for me except it was behind a cumberland farms convenience store dumpster and my friends left me squatting and trashed for the manager to find me.

[doc marten soul]

Apparently it was behind a 7-11, or so the police would have me believe. Other than that, the worst I've done is having to piss in a bottle on the interstate, then pouring it out the window on a passing motorists windshield (not intentional, but damn funny)

[Loathe]

I've had to shit in some nasty alleys across the world. Drunk in Italy, Egypt. Sick in the mountains of Afghanistan. Nasty dumps here in DC. Pissing is nothing.

[Loathe]

I was sitting in a subway and the fucking thing wouldn't get moving. So I pissed out the open door of the subway car onto the platform. That's basically all I remember of the next 3 hours getting home.

Oh I was on the metro going home drunk one night and while remaining seated whipped my shit out, pissed all over the floor, stood up, re-racked, zipped up and walked over to my friends. That shit was pretty fucking funny.

[Eek-a-Will]

when i was at a hotel party i was tanked beyond anything so i had to pee and my friend helped my drunk ass walk to the bathroom only to fall down next to the tiolet...instead of helping me stand up i just pulled it out and pissed laying down and i didnt miss at all haha

[AttitudeSkin]

I pissed in a bath tub some chick was sleeping in. I honestly didn't know she was there until I looked down when I was done. Her feet were covered in piss, and she was still knocked out.....

[Dirt_Boy]

Oh I was on the metro going home drunk one night and while remaining seated whipped my shit out, pissed all over the floor, stood up, re-racked, zipped up and walked over to my friends. That shit was pretty fucking funny.
AHAHAHAHA Was that the weekend before I left?

[Eek-a-Will]

I also pissed in some letterboxes.
my friend took a shit in a bag and put it in my friends mailboxes he loved his special delivery

[Dirt_Boy]

And like loathe said, when you've shit in some crazy places, pissing in nothing. I think the best place I ever pissed or shit was stopping for a piss break in Iraq, I had the shits so bad I couldn't hold it, so I got out of the truck walked under the trailer and let the mud butt flow. I also took many a piss along the roads of Iraq. The worst though...Driving a tractor trailer down a road in Iraq and making your TC hold your piss bottle so you can keep a hand on the wheel and a hand on your dick. Also if you planto try that..make sure the cap is on the bottle before you have your TC throw it out....or he'll be wearing it ahahaha

[Screwloose]

Walking down the sidewalk leaving a trail of piss. Just pull it out, aim it at the deck and let fly. We musta "marked" most of the Fan in Richmond like that between '94 and '95. Ahh.. good times... I think.

[Loathe]

AHAHAHAHA Was that the weekend before I left?

yes, yes it was.

[Dirt_Boy]

yes, yes it was.
shit that was a great fuckin weekend

[Loathe]

shit that was a great fuckin weekend

Shhhh, they'll hear you :)

[eyeball]

on the side of the freeway :( we ran out of gas after leaving the bar

[Acari Rotter]

On my way to see a World Cup game (broadcast on a huge screen in downtown Seoul) I needed to take a shit. The only places open at the time were a convenience store and a massage parlour. The convenience store told me to go to the rub n' tizzug. I ran in and a guy in a tuxedo stopped me. I said "You have to let me use your bathroom." He wouldn't. So I went out back and left them some alley gravy. I had a pack of tissues (survival necessity in Asia) and everything was alright.

At my housewarming party several years ago, I got way too drunk and ended up locking myself in the only washroom so I could be sick in peace. One of my friends needed to piss bad so I told him to go off the balcony. He doesn't quite remember whether he did or not, but he stopped complaining about having to go at least.

[sevenatenine]

a kitty litter box haha
and various places such as parking lots, bushes, ect

[Tokyohoon]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v608/evilincarnate/thinklikeadog.jpg

Photo courtesy of Acari Rotter :)

[MONK]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v608/evilincarnate/thinklikeadog.jpg

Photo courtesy of Acari Rotter :)

ahhh i knew you just had to bust it out.

[weknowhowtolive]

True story: I had a buddy that would "sleep piss" all the time. He would wake up in the middle of the night and piss in his wifes shoes and sometimes in her dresser drawers. I don't know what the fuck was going on with that.I got a buddy that used to do that. Once he pissed in this girls bedroom..just all over her CDs and shit...and the other time i woke up in a living room to see him pissing in some poor fuckers stove. Ive never pissed anywhere weirder than myself.

[Dirt_Boy]

This chick I used to fuckin in highschool, I got wated and ended up over at her house one nite, she wasnt home but her mom let me in. I slept in her bed, the next morning I woke up to a wet bed, I"m assuming I pissed the bed in my sleep, so instead of saying anything I threw a blanket over it and hurried out the door,

[Packratt]

In a beer bottle... then made someone else drink it.

But who hasn't done that.

[BoobsNBoots]

I've peed...everywhere.

I have to pee all the time (like a typical woman, right?) so for my birthday my guy friends bought me a "gag" gift called the travel john. It's pretty cool actually..it turns your pee into gel. I haven't used it yet though.

[Knucks]

On the steps of the Providence courthouse after Toots and the Maytals.

[grouchybastid]

Then there's always the classic: too drunk to get out of bed, so reach next to the bed and piss in a series of empty beer bottles.

Sucks when you wake up the next morning, having forgotten that you now have a six pack of stale piss to dispose of.

[Dutch Raven]

I almost forgot:

A guy I used to hang out with got a blowjob from this local slut. After a while he thought he had to come, but it could also be piss, so he just let it rip.
Pissed her hole mouth and face under. She spat it out on the bed.
The guy who had to sleep there just turned over the matrass (sp?) and slept on it, hahahaha.

I also know a lot of people who took a shit on a car of people they don't like...

[Loathe]

At a recent Business show, some friends and I were in the green room hanging out. One of my friends is the front man for one of the opening bands.

So he's wrecked, and complaining because the event planners promised hum all the beer he could drink, and the room is being stocked.

So he proceeded to rip off all the vent covers and things in the room, and him and my other friend pissed in them all, then they put the vents back.

[flathead]

just the other night at the bar i unzipped at a table, pissed into a pint glass and set it up on the table.

hahaha we have done that several times too, especially if club/restaurant/pub is packed. best thing of all is that there is some people who like to steal some drinks from the table's...

...:biggrin:

[circlestorm]

my housemate brough back some crusty punk kid and his girlfriend who he knew, they where both dirty flea-bag motherfuckers, but being polite i talked to them and stuff and i went to sleep in my room. They stayed up drinking and smoking weed with my housemate.

I woke up at about five am to go to work and heard the sound of someone pissing, i saw the guy pissing in the corner of the living room,i did the really stupid shit of grabbing and shouting at him and of course he spins around and pisses all over my overalls,workboots and harrington.

I wasn't a happy bunny.

[eddie shots]

i have you all beat and this is no bullshit. one night after working about 14 hours and then partying my ass off i went back to the folks house (i was living down the jersey shore at the time). i passed right the fuck out. i slept walk into my parents room and started pissin on the end of my parents bed. needless to say pops lumped me up pretty good, but the whole time he was punching me i thought he was knocking on the bathroom door to get in until i snapped out of my spell. no wonder my parents cant stand when i stop by.

[Boothead]

In front of some cops, no seriously, knowing they are walking your way and still taking the sock out to drop some gold. That fine was the most unnecasery one I've ever had.

[rogo]

I almost forgot:

A guy I used to hang out with got a blowjob from this local slut. After a while he thought he had to come, but it could also be piss, so he just let it rip.
Pissed her hole mouth and face under. She spat it out on the bed.
The guy who had to sleep there just turned over the matrass (sp?) and slept on it, hahahaha.

I also know a lot of people who took a shit on a car of people they don't like...

hahahhhaha thats one of the funniest stories ive ever read

[CptnSpaulding]

True story: I had a buddy that would "sleep piss" all the time. He would wake up in the middle of the night and piss in his wifes shoes and sometimes in her dresser drawers. I don't know what the fuck was going on with that.
haha, I have two friends who sleep piss as well......its funny because both of them have pissed in dresser drawers before. Its funny because one of them went completely out of his way to go upstairs and piss in one of my other roomates drawers when the bathroom is on the first floor. haha, I fucking love it....I do make sure to lock my door though

[CptnSpaulding]

In a beer bottle... then made someone else drink it.

But who hasn't done that.
shit, we could start a thread on that

[CptnSpaulding]

I almost forgot:

A guy I used to hang out with got a blowjob from this local slut. After a while he thought he had to come, but it could also be piss, so he just let it rip.
Pissed her hole mouth and face under. She spat it out on the bed.
The guy who had to sleep there just turned over the matrass (sp?) and slept on it, hahahaha.

I also know a lot of people who took a shit on a car of people they don't like...
uhhh, isnt it physically impossible to piss when erect?

not calling you a liar, but that breaks some rules of the human body.....unless he has mad skills like that

[Dutch Raven]

uhhh, isnt it physically impossible to piss when erect?

not calling you a liar, but that breaks some rules of the human body.....unless he has mad skills like that

Don't know. I've pissed with a half-stiffy. :p

[skoidat69]

So, what's the worst place you've ever pissed?

I got really really drunk and stopped breathing for a few minutes and pissed myself. I think that I win the award

[CptnSpaulding]

I got really really drunk and stopped breathing for a few minutes and pissed myself. I think that I win the award
I think eddie shots might win

[Dawgnuts]

I can piss when I got a partial boner. not full wood but when its comin down.

[siobahn]

So, what's the worst place you've ever pissed?absolute worst? that's a tough one... here are a few that i remember:

- 3 feet from the bathroom in a stranger's kitchen (she never did find out what happened to her dish towel)

- on a table in an interrogation room at the police station (my personal favourite)

- off an overpass over a major highway

- in the middle of the floor at a bar, just after a show ended, the lights came on and people were leaving

- off a roof 5 stories up

- "behind" a car (so i thought) across the street from a party with 40+ people on the lawn

[MONK]

not drunk but just had to go. iraq 2003 we were on the 7tons doing a movement up north. i had to piss so fucking bad from drinking a shitload of water so i stood up and moved to the tail end of the truck, unbottoned my trousers and just let go. all these kids started running up to the truck. lets just say some poor bastard kid in iraq is gonna have to live with the fact he found out what a golden shower was.

[bacon_lettuce_tomato]

I pee all over the fuckin northside and I represent when I do it.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v125/bloodterror77/peeingonNS.jpg

[Dutch Raven]

Hahaha, standing that close will give you wet pants and boots!

[Knucks]

Funny pissing story...

When I was living in Hawaii, I had three really good buddies I hung out with all the time. They were all Marines, and they'd come over to my apt to eat dinner and hang out and drink, and we had some great parties over there...

So one of the guys, we'll call him "T." for the sake of this story, had his birthday on Thanksgiving, and so of course we had to have a party for him. We took him out drinking and were buying him double shots of Wild Turkey all night. Got him completely annihilated, then took him back to my apt to drink some more. Anyhow, by about 2am T is so shitfaced he can barely move. He informs us he really has to pee, and staggers to the bathroom. The rest of us are out in the living room drinking and listening to music, so were not really paying attention, but after a bit, someone notices T hasnt come back from the bathroom yet.

The way my apt was set up, you could see into the full bath from the half bath in my bedroom through a sliding door... so we snuck around through my room to see what the hell T was doing in the bathroom that was taking him so damn long. We poke our heads around the corner, and there he is (after about 20 min!!) standing over the toilet, bracing himself against the wall over it with one hand, still fully clothed, not even "in position" (so to speak) to take a piss. After a few seconds, T starts undoing his pants, and its then we notice that he's already pissed... EVERYWHERE... down his leg, in his jeans, all over the floor, on the bathroom rug... hes standing in a fucking lake of piss in my bathroom. He proceeds to take off his pants and shirt so he's in piss soaked tighty whiteys and a wifebeater, leave them soaking on the floor, and starts walking toward us trying to get into my room and LAY DOWN ON MY BED.

My one friend and I managed to get him back into the bathroom (he was a big fucking dude, and really strong), and we tossed him in the shower and turned the cold water on him... he was fucking pissed... went and passed out in the guest room. I still have a pic of him from the following morning, sitting on the empty keg in the corner of my living room, leaning his head against the wall, looking miserable with a bottle of Sunny D in his hand. :biggrin:

[bacon_lettuce_tomato]

Hahaha, standing that close will give you wet pants and boots!
Nah, its just the picture. Im a couple feet away.

[SouthSide Eric]

I pee all over the fuckin northside and I represent when I do it.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v125/bloodterror77/peeingonNS.jpg
Hahaha!! Did that a couple of times last night/this morning!!! Only thing I hate about pissing in those alley's is all the 'beware of rat's' signs!!!

[Dawgnuts]

Your left foot is touching the wall! Thats the stance of little peter pissing. I know your kind. You get all up in the urinal before you pee, or you get really close to whatever you are pissing on.

[Yorkshire Rich]

well,

Down the stairs of my ex-colleagues parents carpetted stairs, in their imaculate house - I'd got steaming at a works do, he didn't think I'd make it home, so took me back., i got a bit lost.

Got into one of my normal staes, and pissed half way up the stairs in the local nightclub - bouncer caught me in the process, "I'll be leaving now then?"

Stayed over at my mates house, woke up in his front room in the middle f the night surrounded my bodies, wen't to open the door to get to the toilet, and the handle fell off, managed to find an antique coal bucket, which did the job perfectly.

My mate still has you all beat though;

http://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a48/YorkshireRich/IMG_0654.jpg

[Knucks]

My mate still has you all beat though;

http://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a48/YorkshireRich/IMG_0654.jpg

Now THAT is fucking priceless.

[bacon_lettuce_tomato]

Your left foot is touching the wall! Thats the stance of little peter pissing. I know your kind. You get all up in the urinal before you pee, or you get really close to whatever you are pissing on.
Hey, in my family we have a saying. Its not the size that matters, its the sound it makes when it hits the floor.

[CptnSpaulding]

Nah, its just the picture. Im a couple feet away.
mmmm, must be trick photography

[steeltoed_prick]

On my hippie neighbor's front door, while knocking so he'd open it, and after that on various freshcuts throughout the years, but that's nothing all that significant. My buddy used to pull his shit out in the middle of a crowd at shows and just go, though. Always a good laugh at that one.

[sidcup kev]

On Newcastle Uniteds footie ground ............my mate wasnt too impressed either, me staying in his gaff in the toon ......hopefully Ill start a trend !!

[Brokiller]

Some bitch's face wash bottle, after she pissed me off at her house party.
Also several laundry rooms.

[Blood Red Eagle]

i went to this party one time, friend of a friend shit you know, turns out these people were fucking commies and freak dropkick motherfuckers, so i pissed all over their clean dishes on the sink rack drying. they came out while i was in mid piss and they stood there shocked, and i just said what the fuck are you looking at mate, i'm gunna get stage fright so off you go, and they did, and didnt say shit. i would have been happier if they didnt find me however, and ate their food off my piss.

EDIT: good thread btw dutchie.

[lionhearted 1]

i remember a few years ago leaving this rock bar with a few friends and we were all hanging out on the strip conversing with the ladies and whatnot. i noticed i had to piss and couldnt hold it so i ran in this apartment building, pulled out and started pissing in the hallway... well some piss ended up going under this one door and some longhair fucker came out and got confrontational with me then said "take off your shirt and wipe it up"... i laughed in his face, invited him outside for a fight, and walked away. it was pretty funny shit.